My Taxi-ride Into Organized Chaos

My first year in Skopje, I rode in taxi's pretty much every day. Just enough to be scared spitless about having to drive myself one day. Driving in Skopje is, as I affectionately like to refer to it, "Organized Chaos."

One colleague advised me early on that I needed to drive offensively rather than defensively. At the time that didn't make sense to me, but after countless times of sitting in the middle of an intersection waiting for someone to slow up long enough for me to turn left, I get it. You just gotta go for it and force your way at times. There's nothing like the feeling of driving by the seat of your pants!

When a colleague went on HA I was assigned their car to drive for the year. After a year of close calls in a taxi I put foot to pedal with extreme trepidation. Wouldn't you know, but on the second day I got a ticket. According to the policeman I'd turned right over a double white line. Every time I pass that same intersection to this day I note the fact that the line is dashed and that the ticket wasn't deserved. But I digress...

Now that I'm in to my sixth year here, I've gotten really good at parallel parking, driving within inches of parked cars crowding a barely two-lane road, and finding my turn-window and going for it. Now-days I'm more likely to take a taxi because of the limited parking situation by my apartment building. Thus, in five years there's been lots of scary near misses, including one "bump" with another taxi , but today's combined ride was one to remember.

First, the taxi was fairly old so that I was wondering if it'd be even up for the drive across town. But as I found, people may not have a lot here, but what they have they take care of. Even the really old things are maintenanced with care.

Money is tight, so taxi's also tend to drive with as little petrol as needed, yet amazingly I've never been in a taxi that ran out of gas... until today... well, almost... The taxi chug-a-lugged with the gas guage incomprehensively well below the "E" and yet it made it to my destination.

Then there was the near-miss at the intersection. The taxi was full on into the intersection waiting for his chance to turn (or just to go for it), but no chance came so he was still completely stranded in the exact middle of the intersection when the lights changed. I sat there helplessly and watched the oncoming traffic head quickly towards my side of the taxi. My heart probably skipped a dozen beats, but then the taxi found his window and moved. So, almost hit, but not today.

Then down the final stretch, the car continued it's chug-a-lug and the driver looked left at the same time as coming to within 1-inch of a pedestrian on the right side of the road. He didn't even know the guy was there! I did, however, and my heart sped up past the dozen beats it'd just skipped and my breath shot into my lungs. We almost hit that guy... almost.

BTW, did I mention that pedestrians have no right of way and really take their safety into their own hands? Oh yes, and sidewalks are really for parking and cross-walks are like playing a reality game of "Frogger." Again, I digress...

After another long breathless and high blood-pressure block and I arrived at my destination. Safe and sound. Thus another typical taxi-ride or driving experience in Skopje comes to a close. Lots of "almosts" but no "completelys." :)

Then Some Days Surprise Me

There was no "Crying Over Tomatos" in today's visit to the market. Infact, this was one of the most encouraging trips with regards to language and cultural learning.

Christine had just gotten a DVD player and needed the all-important SKART cable to be able to connect to her ancient TV. The electronics store didn't sell them (strange eh?) so I suggested trying our local outdoor market as that is where I was able to find one 5 years ago. (You'd be surprise what treasures await the interested shopper at the local pazaar here.)

We entered the market and headed towards the "mans section" of the market (where the electronics and gadgets are). As we passed booths displaying the vibrant winter citrus fruits, multiple varieties of nuts, olives and root vegetables the sellers would call out to us, 'Povelete?" or "May I help you?" and them lauch into their shpile as to why we should buy their product.

When I first moved here I felt obligated to acknowlege each and every one of them saying, "no, thank you.... no, thank you..." Today? I just peruse their wares with my eyes and keep walking, without saying a word or even catching eye contact. Cultural victory! :)

As we made our way down the aisles, I noted how certain vendors have become my regular stops. Yes, I have a "Fruit-Guy", a "Cheese-Guy," and even an "Egg-Man." One of them was away from his stall, but we greeted each other later when we passed by each other in the aisle.

Upon ariving on the outskirts of the gadget section, I paused and right away (what luck!) found the SKART cable. Then there was some questions and discussion on what exact cable she needed. Yes, my vocabulary is still limited, but what words I had came easily. I even found energy-saver light-bulbs in the smaller size and negotiated obtaining a cable to connect my camera to my TV so I can change the settings (the LCD screen was broken in the summer... and somehow the settings had gotten changed to B&W... so I'd like to fix that...)

After this, we made our way to a fruit/veggie-seller so that Christine could get some mushrooms to stuff for her dish for the team Christmas party tomorrow. Some more negotiating prices and how many were needed and we were done. I noticed that the guy was tending to switch to English for her but would speak to me in Macedonian. That was such an encouraging moment for me, because his English was so good he didn't have to switch.

I so remember being in Christines shoes when I was just four months here (she just recently celebrated her four-month anniversary... yeah). I would get so frustrated as I tried to stretch my language legs only to find them wobbly and people simply ignoring my attempts and answering in English. They're trying to be helpful, but to the language learner, this can be frustrating (ask me how about the trick I sometimes use to handle this... snicker). Anyways, knowing that's how it used to be for me, I was so excited to realize that this vendor didn't switch with me but just spoke Macedonian and even corrected his co-worker when he tried to speak English with me saying, "She understands." Anyways, it was one of those moments when I realized a small language vicgtory. I'll take it!

After this, Christine headed home and I continued shopping. I bought almonds from the "Nut Guy" to make chocolate covered almonds for tomorrows team party. Then I headed to fruit seller (not my normal fruit-guy, pictured above) to buy some mandarines or tangerines. I couldn't decide. One of the sellers peeled one of the mandarines for me to try because he wanted to convince me that they were much better quality than the others, and they didn't have seeds either.

After the flavor explosion on the first slice, I was persuaded and purchased a kilo. As I started to walk off his partner tried to convince me to buy other things. Well, he figured out I was a foreigner and so asked me where I was from. Then proceeded to ask if was was from England, France or Italy... I responded that I was American. He asked if I was visiting here or if I lived here... then without giving a moment for me to answer he continued, "Are you married? I'm not married. You can hook up with me...." Well, I politely said, "Thank you for the oranges," and "Have a nice day," and walked away! I made a mental note to not stray away from my regular "Fruit-Guy" again and then congratulated myself on handling the situation with ease and not getting flustered (and even that I'd understood what he said... implied). Langauge/Culture victory. :)

After this encounter I made another small purchase of onions at the stall of an older woman. She spotted that I was a foreigner, but again, the conversation went smoothly and she was suitably impressed with my speaking. We shared a few minutes of pleasant conversation and then I wished her happy New Year and started home. Cultural high point (chatting with older people about anything is always a totally highlight for me.)

My favorite moment from tonight, though not at the market, was walking out of the DVD store with Christine. We were talking as we passed by a father and son. The son asked his father, "What language are they speaking, Daddy?" He asked this in Macedonian, of course. Well, I don't know why, but I answered for him saying, "English." The father started chuckling and I looked back. Oh, I wish I could describe to you the look of shocked surprise on the little boys face. Even now, the memory makes me laugh. What a fun moment that was.

While I'm encouraged by the times that locals mistake me for also being Macedonian, days like today can be more encouraging to me. While the people on the most part knew I was a foreigner, they treated me like a local, rather than a visitor or tourist. Now that is a culture/language victory for me to write about. :)

*****

If you're interested in reading about the day I "cried over tomatos," here's the link to my old blog: http://balkanupdate.spaces.live.com/blog/cns!660C45E1AF918E49!548.entry

I Bought VODKA Today!

Wow! I can hear the sharp gasps and shocked exclamations all the way over here! But believe it or not, by the end of this blog you just may be running out to buy a bottle for yourself. Trust me. ;)

Living overseas, specifically in the Balkans, you learn to live without a lot of things: live Christmas trees that don’t come in a planter pot, 3-hole punches and molasses for instance. You also learn how to work with what’s available, improvise, or, when all else fails, to (ahem) make something from scratch like, say, tortillas. Though, sometimes, if you wait long enough the coveted item just may show up on the local grocer’s shelf. Just a few of the items to wondrously appear in the last five years are: tortillas, brown sugar (both light and dark), dried cranberries, M&M’s, sweet potatoes (a must for Thanksgiving), and FRESH cilantro (yesssss!).

Now at this point you may be catching on to the fact that I’m talking about cooking or baking, but you may still be asking yourself, “What in the world does that have to do with Carolyn buying vodka??”

Oh, I’m so glad you asked. Would you believe me if I told you that you might already be using this ingredient in your baking? (Shocker!)

Well, believe it or not, vodka is the key ingredient in vanilla extract, which you can’t get here. Vanilla sugar is available, however because it’s sugar it alters the chemistry of what you’re baking. Unless you adjust the recipe you may end up with an ooy-gooey mess of melted chocolate chip cookies like I did when I made my first batch here 5 years ago. The only real option for us expats who use vanilla extract in just about every dessert has been to bring a bottle with us or have someone send us one.

Then I learned a little secret: you can make your own vanilla extract with just a vanilla bean, vodka and time! Vanilla beans are easy. They actually can be found here AND they’re about 1/3 the cost of buying them in the US. In fact, when I saw how cheap they were I bought a couple, though I didn’t have a clue what to do with them… until now, that is. Then there’s the vodka, well that’s a plenty and not so expensive either (100ml was just over $1).

So on the way home from work today I bought some vodka. (!) My imitation vanilla extract is almost gone and so I’m really looking forward to having some real vanilla extract available in just a few weeks, and it cost me only about $5. J

Now if I’ve piqued your interest and you’d like to try to make your own, here’s the skinny on how to do it:

What you need:
Vanilla beans, which can be found cheap online
Vodka
Glass containers that can seal airtight
Smaller glass containers for the finished product.

The Process:
Cut the vanilla bean lengthwise, leaving a portion still attached at the end, and place in glass container. Pour in vodka, completely covering the vanilla bean. Seal and store on a shelf for about 8 weeks. A couple of times each week shake the jar gently to mix things up.

The extract will be ready to use in eight weeks. The longer you leave it, the stronger it will get. When desired potency is achieved, strain and re-bottle in smaller containers, leaving a piece of vanilla bean in each jar.

The really cool thing about this is that by leaving a bit a bean in you can have a perpetual source of homemade vanilla extract simply by adding more vodka when the extract gets low. It will be diluted for a few days but will quickly get back to potency. Don’t throw away the remaining vanilla beans either. Store them for future use (though not in the fridge cause they can get moldy).

So there you go. Oh, what was that? Did I just hear someone grab their keys and head out the door to the store? ;)

When a Dollar's NOT a Dollar

To be frank, I resent the fact that a dollar is still just a dollar in the US, while here in Europe a dollar is only about 0.68€ cents and going down... fast!

At the end of June this year were were able to close our fiscal year with $1 equalling 0.76€ cents. How far the dollar has fallen since then! In fact, the biggest drop has happened in just the last two months. The all-time low was hit just last Saturday (rates according to Oanda.com):

Saturday, November 10, 2007
1 US Dollar = 0.68065 Euro
1 Euro (EUR) = 1.46918 US Dollar (USD)

Now when you're talking in one and two dollars, a few cents may not seem like a big deal. Well, let me put it into more noticable terms:

$100, still worth $100 of buying power in the US... but worth only €68.07 here

$500, worth $500 of buying power in the US... but worth only €340.33 here

$1000, worth $1000 of buying power in the US... but worth only €680.65

Let me flip this a little bit so that you can see what it means in terms of budgeting (especially if your books are in USD but your live and work in Europe):

Say in June you set your budget based on a higher than market rate ($1=€0.7353)... but as the year goes on and the dollar drops, this is what happens...

€500 rent budgeted for in June at $661.20 is now hitting your budget at the market rate value of $734.59. An increased hit on your budget of $73.39.

€25 phone bill budgeted for $33.06 is now hitting your budget at the market rate value of $36.73. An increased hit on your budget of $3.67.

€50 utilities bills budgeted for at €66.12 is now hitting your budget at the market rate value of $73.46. An increased hit on your budget of $7.34.

The €45 to fill up your gas tank (Unleaded) is now hitting at $66.11 when it would have only been $59 a couple months ago. An increased expense of $7.11.

Now these are just a few minor examples of every-day budget items. Looking at it, any one line item in itself may not seem like a big deal; however, when you add them up and over a period of time, the results are significant. In some cases it can mean thousands of dollars in less buying power for your budget.

Then there is your US bank account that you use to have money transferred here or withdraw money from an ATM. Each month that USD is decreasing in it's Euro value.

Say you have $1000 in your bank account. Well, back in June that was worth €756. That same $1000 today is only worth €680.

Or what if you're a business/NGO or other organization who has a US bank account, but keeps it's books in Euro? Well, that can result in huge losses on your trial balance as a result of revaluation each month as the dollar declines. For instance:

Say you have $100,000 in your US bank account....

In June it would have been valued at €75,620 on your trial balance.

In July that same amount would have been valued at €73,239. A loss of €2381.

In August that 100K would have been valued at €73,285. A slight gain of €46.

In September it would have been valued at €70,117. A loss of €3168.

In October the value would have been €69,396. A loss of €721.

If November were to close today, the value would be €68,265. A further loss of €1131.

Now if you add all those losses together, the resulting hit against your budget would be €7355. Or $10,805 less of your budget to spend.

Now, let me take this ranting of mine one step more personal. Say you get paid $900* a month. In June you would have had €680 for living expenses, savings, tithe, etc. This month, however, you would have €612. That hurts. Especially when you're trying to save for vacation and all nearby options use Euro...

So will the dollar EVER come back? Or will it continue to decline to the point of oblivion?

Thus I come to the end of this tale of woe of when a dollar is not a dollar.

*This amount is for example purposes only and it not necessarily a real amount.

Language Learning... in as few words as possible

Language learning can seem like a long and tedious process...

Language learning can get your tongue all tied up or your mouth twisted into seeminly unnatural contortions.

Му, го, ги, што?

Language Learning can make you feel like you're "doing hard time" in a prision of frustration and ambiguity...

"Hey! Where's my 'get out of jail free' card?!"

Language Learning can make your head feel like it's going to explode!

"Ќе ме пукене главата!"

Language Learning can have you putting the wrong things in the wrong places... many many mistakes which can become the fodder for funny stories (though many unshareable as you stumble across certain "words")....

"The direct, indirect, huh? goes where?"

Language Learning can seem at times to be moving along quite smoothly.... only to find you're going the wrong way...

But then there are those bright shiny moments of hope admist the seemingly never-ending darkness of Language Learning....

...Like when you go to the "Нотар" (pronounced "Notar" not "hotap") and can honestly answer "yes" when they ask if you understand the contract you just signed....

...of course it's not advisable to follow up that moment of triumph by demonstrating your language prowess like I did by saying, "Еден убав сончез ден, ќе разбирам се... но денеска не е донот за мене." Translation: "One bright sun-shiney day, I will understand everything... but today is not that day."

...Yet, the rays of that bright sun-shiney day of the future do extend to the here and now when you realize that you're able to share tangible hope with someone who is going through an extemely difficult time... in their own heart-language.

A moment just like that came for me just this past week as I was able to share with a dear lady, who has lost so much in this past year, hope from God's word and in her own language. How exciting to see the embers of hope growing within her as she shared with me a verse from the Bible that has really touched her heart... "Cast all your cares upon Him for He cares for you." ... and I was able to understand her thanks to Learning the Language.

That kind of fruit makes all the labor worth while.

This post is lovingly dedicated to my colleagues around the world who are in various stages of the journey towards that bright sun-shiney day. Please pray for us all as we journey along the curvy road that is Language Learning.

PS and please forgive me all the blatant uses of cliches and mixed-metaphors. ;)

The "dreaded" trip to the visa office

Every year I must face it... the dreaded trip to the visa office to submit my applications for residence and work. First, there's the mound of paperwork to prepare, notarize and sign. Then there's the waiting while a letter petitioning the Ministry of Something-Specific gets approved. The hike up 9 (NINE) flights of stairs to stand in a dark hall of some nameless frosted-glass door, awaiting your turn. The nervous waiting and answering dozens of questions as the official examines each and every document in detail... "Will they accept my application?" is the question that worries it's way through my mind every time.

Well, this morning the beautiful, warm and sun-shiney day should have been my first clue that this year would be different. After dreading the 9 flight hike, I found that there were two small elevators that would carry you at least to the 7th floor and then you'd just hike up the remaining two. So, my contact from the church and I squished into the sardine can with two others and slowly made our way up to the 7th floor.... I was trying so hard not to pay attention to the sounds (creaks, scratches, and rattlings) as some mysterious wire ushered us upwards...

Once reaching the 7th floor we wound our way around several windy, twisty hallways until we could find the stairs to take us the additional two floors up. Once outside the visa office, moments before we went in, my contact chose that moment to tell me something that she'd just learned. Aparently there is a new law that if your visa is expired you get into big trouble and can be taken to court. The rush of adrenaline that filled me was instant and powerful as we both knew that my visa had expired on the 1st and here it is the 13th. "Well," I thought, "whatever happens, happens" and entered the office with just a little trepidation.

The man who greeted us was not the usual person from years previous. My heart was dreading the questions and such to come as to why my visa had expired in addition to all the normal questioning.... But I held out my hand and gave a firm handshake and said, "Good morning, Sir." He smiled a really genuine smile, looked at my expired visa, noted it almost in passing, then asked if all the paperwork was there, saw it was and then said, "OK" and that it will cost such-and-such. With not so much as one question, one suspicious or evaluative glance or detailed examination of my documents, we were done. AND he was SO NICE and NOT AT ALL scary to boot!

As my contact and I left the office we just kind of stared at each other in bewilderment and then broke out into suprised happy giggles of relief and joy. SERIOUSLY, it's never been this easy nor gone this smoothly!!! Frankly, I'm still in a bit of a daze that it went so well.

Thank you for the many who were praying.

Macedonia Mourns Loss of Beloved Son

Toshe Proeski

1981-2007

Today is a sad day here in Macedonia as earlier this morning singer Toshe was killed a tragic car accident in Croatia. He was a very talented young man who could sing classical like Pavoratti, disco like Tom Jones, and rock/pop with his own unique style. Honestly, I don't know that there was a genre of music that he couldn't sing, and sing with near perfection. He made difficult stylings, rhythms and melodies seem so easy -- when truly they weren't.

Hundreds are gathered in the city squares all over the country... crying, placing candles, flowers, pictures, and letters in memorial while trying to come to grips with the shock of his suddenly being gone. Just 10 days ago he'd held a concert in the city stadium to a sold-out crowd. Tonight, just minutes ago, the beating of helicopter blades echoed ominously through the city as it flew overhead, heading toward the airport, carrying Macedonia's beloved son back home.

Tomorrow will be a national day of mourning and the funeral will be held in his hometown of Krushevo. Toshe is remembered not only as a talented singer, but a young man with a very big heart, especially for kids, a great humanitarian who loved people, and his country. A Macedonian treasure.

Here's a link to a You Tube tribute by a fan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OclMzxOdEgY

Equinox in the Balkans

I didn't look at my calendar yesterday, but walking home after church I just knew it had to be the first day of Fall. The scorching heat of the summer was gone and a slight chill accented the warm morning air, but that's not how I knew. At first it was only a hint of it in the air, but then a light breeze picked up and there it was! The smokey sweet smell of roasting peppers.

From now until about mid-October this smell will dominate your senses here in the Balkans as people roast peppers for making a local specialty called "Ivar." (aka in Cyrillic letters "AJBEP.") This is a type of pepper-relish that is great on bread with feta cheese. Though it can be an aquired taste, it's a whole lot of cultural fun to make.

Two years ago I was able to go out to a nearby village with a couple from church and make it. Boy was it hard work! Yes, it's just washing, roasting, peeling and coring, but when you're working with 50 kilos (about 110lbs) of peppers it adds up! The time spent with Macedonians making it, though, is pricesless.

If you're feeling adventurous, here's a simple recipe to make your own Ivar: (ingredients and amounts can vary here by region)

3 kilos red sweet peppers (pictured above)

2-3 small hot peppers to spice it up for flavor (optional... add too many and it's called "lutenitsa"... or hot sauce rather than ivar)
1 small eggplant

Oil

Salt to taste

Wash and core peppers (some Macedonians will actually peel and core after roasting, but trust me, it's SO much easier to core first to get rid of all the seeds rather than later).

Grill the peppers and eggplant over wood (best for the smokey flavor) until skin is crispy

As each batch is done, place peppers and the eggplant in a plastic bag to "sweat"

Peel the peppers, cut lenthwise and place them in a bowl or on a plate

Peel the eggplant

Grind the peppers and eggplant together and put in large soup pot

Add about 1tsp salt to start and 1/3 cup oil (personally, I like to use as little as possible, while locally, they'd use a bit more)

Cook over low/med heat for several hours, stirring with a wooden spoon.

Put some fresh warm Ivar on some bread and enjoy! Jar and store the remainder. This batch should make about 2 large Majonaise-jars full.

Footnote:

You know, the smell of roasting peppers in the air is just one of the ways to tell that it's the first day of Fall. Other indicators include all the ice cream freezers at the markets will be locked shut (likewise, the harborer of the first day of spring is that they'll all be opened that day) as well as the chestnuts beginning to fall from the trees. Roasting the chestnuts, however, is an indicater of winter, and we're not there yet! ;)

Ten Years and a Name

"Lord, I just want to serve You, and I will go wherever You want me to go." That was the sole desire that filled my heart and my prayer ten years ago today when I answered the altar-call at my church. It wasn't a "come forward and get saved" call, but answering the call to leave all and follow my Lord... wherever. Somehow, ten years on (and five years living overseas) it seems fitting that I get a new name today.

Now I say this a bit tongue-in-cheek because my "new" name is just a typo between latin letters and the same letters in Cyrillic. After opening a bank account and being handed the bankbook, I noticed that my first name was written "Царлзн" aka. "Tsarlzn". This was due to the keyboard letters being different and now this is my new name on an official document. "Tsarlzn." Hmm. Has an interesting ring to it. ;)

I have to smile, though, because it seems fitting to get a "new" name on this personally, spiritually, significant day. I also smile because I know that someday I will receive a real "new" name and that it won't be a mistake. It is one chosen just for me by my Lord, and He knows me best.

And unlike the bank book, the name written into the Lamb's book will not be a typo.

Today has been a day of reflection, grateful and so amazed at His Grace through the years, of anticipation for what things lay ahead in the future, and of receiving a new name. At the end of the day, though, today must circle around to what is still in my heart and filling my prayer: to serve Him and go wherever, to live faithfully before Him and, ultimately, the desire to honor His Name above all.

***

Where are you in this process? Do you know Him? Do you know your name is written in His book? What has He called you to in your life? Are you being faithful to Him and that call?

Stone Dolls, Waterfalls & Stobi Halls -- A Travelogue

A couple of friends and myself decided to take a three-day tour around Eastern Macedonia this past week. What we discovered was that this small country is full of culture, beautiful landscape, delightful people and great destinations.

One of those great destinations was found after following a small sign off the side of the main road indicating an intriguing "Tourist Locality" called "Stone Dolls." Now in my head I was thinking it would be a shop selling small stone statues. But after traveling 3 kilometers on an old rocky dirt road behind a small village and past a creek, I had second thoughts. There were delightful four older gentlemen sitting by the river drinking Rakija and reminiscing about the old days, so we stopped and asked them about the Stone Dolls. They were quite helpful and after crossing a precarious looking bridge and rounding several more corners we came to the Stone Dolls.

The Stone Dolls are actually some impressive rock formations that look like a wedding and guests. There's a bride, groom, best man, maid of honor, in-laws, godparents and a whole host of "guests." It was really quite fascinating. One of the rocks had a profile that looked just like the old Alfred Hitchcock profile. Another one looked like a storm-trooper. Not very wedding-ish, but still pretty cool. :)

On the way back, the men crowded around the car and asked us how we liked the "Dolls," and then invited us to sit and have some rakija! lol. It turns out they were WWII vets and they get together regularly and sit by the creek drinking rakija and reminiscing about the old days.

Another random sign that we followed off the side of the road indicated a "Prehistoric Observatory." As the road went on and on without finding the place, we asked several people along the way for directions. One lady who insisted that there was no such place was standing just 100 yards from another sign we found up the road. Incidentally, the last one we ever saw. At another village we asked a family who had just bought some pork (still squealing and squirming in a plastic burlapy bag on the side of the road), but they didn't know.

At a cafe/store in the middle of nowhere with a couple of donkey's tied up out front, a group of men said it was not too far away. Several miles later down a narrow and curvy road, we found ourselves at a small gypsy village, at the end of the pavement, with another rocky dirt road in front of us and a gypsy lady who'd never heard of any rocks. So, I took a picture of some random large rock on the top of a hill and called it "The Unobserved Observatory" and we drove back to the main road.

This detour was about 30 miles, but it was through some beautiful landscape with some of the healthiest and biggest cornfields I've ever seen, and we had a nice lunch sitting on hill on the side of the road under some oak trees.

Our road trip then took us through Kratovo, a sweet little village with many scenic bridges, and on to Lesnovo where there is a an 11th century monastery with an amazing wall of carved walnut and frescoes on every other surface telling various stories. We got there just about 15 minutes before the evening service, so we stayed for a bit of it. It was interesting to hear the prayers, the chant-like songs, and to see some of the tradition that goes into the practice of the Orthodox religion.

Side note: Getting to Lesnovo where the monastery was was quite interesting as several people gave us several different versions of directions. Our personal favorite was the girl who motioned that we should turn left, but said "turn right."

After Lesnovo we traveled towards Berovo where we would spend the night. On the way we passed by a very old village that I would love to spend some time in, taking pictures and getting to know people. Seriously, many of the homes, barns and buildings looked well over 100 years old in style and architecture -- it was like stepping back in time. As it was getting late we didn't stop, but I will go back there again for sure! The cottage we stayed at the lake in Berovo was beautiful, the trees magnificent and the stars unending! There's just something about the mountains that make me relax deep inside, filled with peace. Kinda like that saying "waiting to exhale." At that place I exhaled.

The next morning we took our time, going for a walk on an old dirt road to a dam, sitting on the rocks overlooking the water, watching the fish, or sitting under an umbrella on the porch enjoying the sun and breakfast. This is a place I will definitely come back to for a retreat from the city. :)

This day we drove down to the bread-basket of Macedonia that is Stumica. Miles and miles of agricultural fields full of corn, peppers, tobacco, vineyards loaded down with fruit, and so much more! We headed over towards the far mountains where we hiked up a trail to see one of the many waterfalls in the area. As the year has been fairly dry, we passed a few dried up springs and the waterfall itself was just a fraction of what it should be this time of year. It was still beautiful, though. I hear there are several more waterfalls in the area and I will most likely go back to explore them soon. :)

That night we stayed with a nice family in Dojran, a lake on the border with Greece. As we sat outside in the humid evening, swatting away the multitudes of mosquitoes, the family broke out a bottle of rakija from thier wedding -- a 28-year old bottle! It would have offended them and been rude to turn it down, so I accepted the small shot glass they offered. Oh my! At the first sip I thought I was going to stop breathing! You could probably power a car with this stuff it's so strong! They also served us some candied figs that the man proudly proclaimed that he'd made all by himself without his wifes help. Now candied figs are something that give me a retch reflex (something about the texture/flavor combination) so I swore I'd never eat them. Again, to turn them down would have offended them. So I ate them, and to my great astonishment, really like them!

The couple was full of tales about their area, their home, what it was like before the break-up of Yugoslavia, etc. The next morning as we sat beneath the fruit-laden fig tree, the lady got goosebumps as she told the story of how the place got it's name -- from the celebration the Turkish army had-- one winter they almost crossed what looked like a great meadow/field before a local told them it wasn't... in fact it was the lake, one of the deepest tectonic lakes in the world. This is one of my favorite things to do, to sit and talk with locals, and learn about them and their culture.

The next morning one of my friends decided to stay on one more day while Wendy and I returned to the city. On the way back we saw the devastation that the fires from July wrecked on the landscape. Miles and miles of charred ground and scorched trees. Thank goodness the fires are out. Now, if summer would just hurry up and end and the rains would come.

The only major stop for this day was at the Stobi ruins [pictures to come]. These ruins date back to the 3rd and 4th century. There is still archaeological digs there as well as what looks like reconstruction/renovation. It will be interesting if they build it back to what it once was. The best place there, though, is the baptistry in the ruins of an ancient Christian church. The baptistry center is about the size of a spa with steps leading down into where the water would be. The surrounding floor is decorated with the most delightful mosaics, depicting happy-looking deer, peacocks, and other decorative features. Wendy and I sat there in the shade enjoying the scene and talking a bit before heading back to the car and back to the city.

This breif trip through Eastern Macedonia was quite the adventure. The next travel-adventure I long to have is to travel to older villages and maybe sit in a small cafe on the street, have a coffee and get to know the locals... oh yes, and to finally find that unobserved observatory!

End note: when planning the trip I'd made the mistake of thinking that we would drive out to one or two destinations each day and then return to the city each night. So, in other words, I didn't pack a bag. For a lesson in how to go three days without a change of clothes, I learned a few tricks and will share if asked. ;)

It wasn't just backfire

Sunday night I heard two loud explosions, sounding at the most 3 blocks away. I went out onto my balcony to look, as did several of my pajama'd neighbors. Hearing no sirens or anything else to break up the unusually quiet night (most everyone is away on holiday) I went back to sleep.

The next morning I mentioned it to my boss, but since I'd not heard any emergency responders we thought perhaps it was just some really loud backfiring of a car (though I didn't really believe it). Then today Wendy asks me if I heard about the attack on the Government building two nights ago! That building is just over 1 long city block from me.

Here's what Reuters wrote in an article entitled "Grenades fired near Macedonian government offices" at the following website (http://www.reuters.com/article/worldNews/idUSL0651616920070806):

So that was a bit more than backfire that I heard. Please keep Macedonia and the people of all ethnicities covered in your prayers.

Prayed for Rain

Friday evening I emailed out a newsletter where I chatted a bit about all the heat and fires that have been ravaging the Balkans in the past couple of weeks and the need for prayer--especially those who have no escape from the heat. Then I said, "What we really need is some rain."

The next morning I woke up to hear the delightful pitter-patter of raindrops on the tin roofs of the surrounding buildings. It didn't last long, but of course my first thought was, "Wow! I just asked people to pray last night!" and "How cool are You, God?!" It stayed cloudy the rest of the day, and then on Sunday the steady, cool, rain began and went all the way through Monday afternoon.

This rain is much needed as is the temperature drop (it's been fluxuating between the upper 50's and low 70's). A much needed change from the dry and dusty 115+ we had just a couple weeks ago. During the heat-wave, fires destroyed thousands of acres throughout the Balkans (pictures are from a fire in Corinth, Greece that had been burning for 3-days before they were finally able to put it out). According to CNN and other news agencies, 500 people died in Hungary due to the extreme heat (mostly elderly and those with respiratory problems). In Kosovo, due to the dry winter and lack of rain, there is a shortage of water and has to be rationed. Again, this cooling weather and rain is a much needed change.

Thank you for praying.

Now it's possible that rain was already in the forecast before I asked people to pray. I don't know, I didn't catch the news that day. But I will still thank God for answering our prayers. He knew our needs even before we even asked and sent the rain. :)

Please let's continue to pray for the many who lost homes, property or loved ones as a result of the recent heatwave and fires.

Limbo, Spear-throwing & Bridge building

Friday night about 18 people crammed into my small apartment for a "Ladies Night Out Luau." The ladies who attended represented a very diverse group. Pastor's wives and other ladies from the Macedonian service, a couple of Dutch gals from the International service, as well as four other ladies. This party was meant to be a place where we could all come together and have some fun and fellowship with the ladies from church, as well as to continue building bridges with neighbors and friends. It went really well.

As each lady arrived she was greeted with a flower lei and an "Aloha" greeting. There was Hawaiian music in the background, a limbo line that had us laughing to hysterics, spear-throwing (aka "darts"), and a type of bowling (tossing an object between two pineapples). The funniest thing for all, though, was the trying of the salty-sweet (pungently strong) Ling Hi Mui (salty sweet dried plumbs). They just couldn’t believe it was a favored Hawaiian snack (Macedonians generally don’t mix salts and sweets, so this “snack” was quite the taste-bud kicker!)

The planning for this began while I was on tour in Hawaii this past January, thinking it would be a lot of fun to share a bit of Hawaiian culture with my Macedonian friends. Individuals from the churches on Oahu really helped a lot with ideas as well as gift-baskets full of goodies to share as well as gifts for the ladies. They also gave me ideas of what kinds of food to have as well: Kalua pork, haupia, etc. The most important thing, though, is the prayer that many have prayed for those who'd be coming.

Here’s the result: Besides the building of fellowship between the ladies of both the Macedonian and International services, it also was a non-threatening environment to build bridges of friendship with others. Please continue to pray for these ladies and for the opportunities to build further bridges, for the Holy Spirit to work in their hearts, drawing them to Him.

For pictures from the party, go to http://spaces.msn.com/balkanupdate

Looking toward the cross and home

Looking out the window of the plane while circling over Mt. Vodno in final approach to the airport in Skopje, my eyes eagerly searched for what I knew would be there: the cross.

I was returning to the Balkans after spending three months on home assignment in the US. The sight of the cross at once filled me with the comfort of the familiar, the instant relaxing of shoulders, knowing that my travels would soon be over and I'd be able to rest in the comfort of my own home.

Honestly, it struck me that seeing the cross could be so comforting to me, because no matter how much I may love Skopje and the people here, I am still very aware of my foreignness. [Frankly, I even felt a bit of that same foreignness while in the States...] On reflecting, I realized that the comfort I felt had more to do with the cross and it's meaning rather than its location. My apartment in the city overlooks the cross and I find myself several times each day looking towards it, standing strong in the day and lighting up the night. My eyes instinctively look for it out the window each day, and each time I'm reminded of a cross from so long ago and what God did for us through it.

Unlike the cross on Mt. Vodno, which lights up at dusk and gets turned off at midnight, the cross of Jesus shines brightly, day or night and into eternity. In the same way that my eyes search out the cross each day or upon returning from travels, it's a reminder to fix our eyes on Jesus and to look forward with eager anticipation for when our travels on this earth will be complete and we'll be at home with Him. In the meantime, while we sojourn here in this place, it's our privilege to serve at the pleasure of the King and to see many others come journey with us, looking toward the cross each day and to Home.

Embracing the Sweat

It’s not the heat of the deep south, the tropics or the high desert, but the scorch of summer in the Balkans. My apartment, for instance, is a steady 83 degrees – even with the old wall-mounted air-conditioner on full-blast in the living room. Some nights it’s so hot that the outside air is stale and murky, the inside air the same and the air-conditioner useless.

Even cooking in my kitchen is no fun and worth considering eating only cold salads for the remainder of summer. [In my kitchen during the summer it’s normally around 90 degrees as the sun beats on it for most of the day. Yesterday the indoor thermometer read 97 degrees after making fajitas].

Inevitably, though, each year I learn to embrace the sweat. I can’t really explain it, but there comes a moment when you just accept that it’s hot and sticky, the discomfort of it all (wet shirts, wet face and wet hair) and actually adapt to it. Living with it rather than against it.

When I first moved here to the Balkans, there was absolutely no reprieve from the heat—at home, in the field office, in stores, etc. Even cold drinks seemed scarce, at room temperature and with no ice. Everywhere the summer heat extended its tentacles and squelched out every ounce of cool that might have been found. The reason for me being here, though, helped to keep things in perspective, and I learned embrace the discomfort with a smile and sense of humor.

Embracing or adapting to certain discomforts is just one of the things I’ve learned to do since coming here to the Balkans. I’m convinced I’m exactly where God wants me to be, doing what He has for me to do. For Him, I’ll do anything, even embrace the sweat.

[Incidentally, after four summers of working in field offices that were more like saunas, the new field office actually has air and it’s SO wonderful and I’m grateful for the reprieve it gives.]

A Timely Strike

To the frustration of commuters, the consternation of traffic cops and the befuddlement of foreigners like me, strike demonstrations of unhappy workers, vendors, taxi cab drivers or anyone else with a grievance take place with amazing regularity here.

The worst protests or strikes are the ones that block the traffic arteries in the already congested downtown area. On any given day one is faced with being quite creative in getting around town and not getting stuck in the mess of honking horns, gestures, and frustration with inconvenience. My personal visual favorite was when the city taxi-cabs made a parking lot of all the city streets – oh how I wish I’d had my camera that day! You’ve never seen such a sight as hundreds of cabs lined up like ribbons all around the city!

Yet, as disruptive as it is, this is a fact of life here and seems pretty accepted. Unlike in America where strikes happen with pickets and days or weeks of standing vigil with emotions high, strikes here seem to have a set time and are more like people just “hanging out”. (Though not always, of course) Thus was the situation I walked into this morning while going into the center to purchase plane tickets.

As I stepped out onto the main street the silence was deafening. My first thought was that it was another holiday (one of the MANY), but the lack of flags posted and closed shops told me otherwise. Then I saw them, a group of about 100 people loitering in the middle of one the busiest intersection in town.

Now any gathering of people gives me pause and makes me consider changing direction and walking another way. This group, though, standing with umbrellas shading them from the scorching 10am sun, reminded me of the type of crowd that gathers awaiting a small town parade, just minus the excited anticipation. Walking past the crowd, with the ever-present policemen standing on each corner, I went to a nearby store to ask what it was.

“Oh, it’s a strike,” amused the shopkeeper, “they’re pazar workers unhappy about new rules or something.”

Walking on to the next intersection I saw that the police were diverting traffic, the streets surrounding the strike closed off in deference to it. Occasionally one car or another would try to make a run for it but the policeman would blow his whistle and step right in front of them, tsk tsking his finger. [Once when this happened it was one of the city busses that the police officer stepped in front of—the huge red bus bowing under the slammed brakes. Man, how did that cops legs not become jelly!?]

Exactly at 11am I was standing again at that same intersection having finished my errands in the center and now looking for a taxi to take me to the field office. It was exactly then that traffic was again allowed down this most heavily traveled street in the city, the strike over and everything back to normal. Such is the typical strike here, with a start and a stop time. Point made.

Just one of the many experiences living in another country where things are so different and at times quite strange, yet are becoming a regular part of daily living.

How 'bout some worms to start?

Wendy and I went out to lunch at a local restaurant where they have great Shopska salads and fresh warm garlic bread. Mmmm. What I didn't know was that they offered worms as an appetizer! Well, at least that's what the menu said.

You know what's even funnier about this, though, was that Wendy pointed it out to me and I still didn't get it. My brain must have been automatically compensating because as she pointed to it I replied something like, "Yes, Warm Starters. They're pretty good too." Seriously, took me a minute or two to get it!

The thing is, Wendy was looking at things with fresh eyes (she's only been in country less than a month). My eyes failed to notice maybe because after being here almost 5 years I've perhaps gotten used to things and/or automatically compensate. So that's why she saw "worm" and I thought "warm."

Looking with fresh eyes is a good thing, especially when you pick out details you'd not seen before. It's also preferable to not become so comfortable that your eyes pass things over, simply accept or compensate for what's missing or wrong.

Well, we didn't end up getting any "worm starters" but the Shopska and garlic bread were fantastic as usual. Several people have asked me what a Skopska is, so I took a picture.

Shopskas are a staple of the diet here and one of my personal favorites. It's made from tomatoes, cucumbers (English) and feta cheese. Sometimes onions and/or green peppers will be added as well. I've tried making them in the US, but the feta just isn't the same (too salty) and, well, Balkan atmosphere must add some of the charm as well.

Well, in the end we had great conversation, great lunch... and no worms. :)

For other great English translation related things, check out Engrish.com.

One "Ragamuffin" Reflecting

Oh to have a life that is "an untarnished success story," and "an unbroken upward spiral towards holiness." This week has been one of those weeks where I'm painfully aware of just how not true that is, and how far I've yet to grow.

Today's devotion out of "Reflections for Ragamuffins" by Brennen Manning (p.165) was quite well-timed and encouraging to me personally, so I thought I'd share. Here's what Mr. Manning had to say...

"There is a myth flourishing in the church today that has caused incalculable harm--once converted, fully converted. In other words, once I accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, an irreversible, sinless future beckons. Discipleship will be an untarnished success story; life will be an unbroken upward spiral toward holiness. Tell that to poor Peter who, after three times professing his love for Jesus on the beach, and after receiving the fullness of the Spirit at Pentecost, was still jealous of Paul's apostolic success.

"Often I have been asked, "Brennan, how is it possible that you became an alcoholic after you got saved?" It is possible because I got battered and bruised by loneliness and failure, because I got discouraged, uncertain, and guilt ridden and took my eyes off Jesus. Because the Christ encounter did not transfigure me into an angel. Because justification by grace through faith means I have been set in right relationship with God, not made the equivalent of a patient etherized on a table."

He concludes with Romans 12:3 "For by the grace given to me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you."

It's really distasteful coming up against ones own character flaws, weaknesses, sin, or "tarnish" and to see just how much one still has to grow. Yet, I'm just so much more grateful for Jesus, my Savior, and desire just that much more to submit to His tranforming work in my life. To be more like Him.

Heb 12:2-32 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. NIV

Just 15 Minutes

OK. I have just till the big hand gets to the 12....

How do people do this? I look at my colleagues blogs and they're great, funny, insightful, informative, challenging, and so many other appropriate descriptors that fail me at the moment. I enjoy blogging and sharing some of these same types of things, but I can never seem to find the time.

Yes, things happen in life and I think, "Oh, I should blog on that." But alas, my schedule gets away from me and I never seem to get long enough to sit down and actually write it out. Here's just a few that I've let slip by:

"Storms of Life" about the awesome storms in Skopje
"The Light in the Darkness" about a period where every light in my apartment went out and it was literally beyond my reach to fix them
"The Strays" about the poor stray dogs in my neighborhood who've become so familar to me
"Beyond my grasp" about the Trinity and grasping it being akin to taking a picture of lightening
"I Resented God" about an recent insight that came as a result of studying about Mary and Martha
"Anything and Everything About Bean-Counting" this title is fascitious because it represents every random thing about being a Balkan bean counter that I've thought to say -- let alone funny experiences, challenges with exchange rates, the reality of the falling dollar, and my perpencity for anal retentiveness
"Blogs about my team" with prayer requests, events, etc.
"Driving in Skopje - An Extreme Sport" about, well, you get the idea

There are many many more, more interesting, ideas that I've had, but the moment has passed. Do I still write them? I'd like to. I enjoy writing and processing things, and if people want to read my ramblings, well, that's fine too.

Though actually writing them out is a whole other thing. I was known in college to spend 8+ hours on a simple one-page pensee for my business classes (my Prof. said it was a good lesson for me in learning to be concise). I won't begin to tell you what a nightmare my thesis on the "heresy that Paul referred to in Colossians" for my Christological Epistles class was. Or what about my final paper for my Theology class entitled "My Fresh Look at the Edge of God" processing the idea of coming to the edge of my faith and finding that it stands, because it stands on Jesus. Oh how I struggled through these topics, analysing every thought, word, structure, idea and expression. [On a side note, though, completely unrelated to my ultimate point here.... even though that process of birthing those writings was so difficult and challenging, the satisfaction with the end result is, well, immense.]

Does the word "perfectionist" come to mind yet? That's perhaps the main reason I procrastinate so much and don't actually blog (or write newsletters back home) as much as I'd like (or should -- in the case of communicating with people in the US). I'm such a perfectionist that the mere thought of writing a newsletter or blog or even "thank you" letters is daunting to me and so I procrastinate. Oh, how I need to learn to be concise!

So, that brings me to this moment. Well, actually, this 15 minutes that I've allowed myself to take a break and rant about my weakness of perfectionism and procrastination. Perhaps I will slowly take 15 minutes here and there and actually write up some of those ideas mentioned earlier. I need to "just do it" (thanks, Nike) and not worry about that there may be spelling errors, or imperfect thoughts, or (gasp) conciseness. Perhaps the more I practice this, the easier it will be. 15 minutes is so much less daunting than.... oops, my time is up and I must leave that thought hanging...

Field Forum Bound

This is just a quicky blog to say: hit, aloha, zdravo, mirdita, hola, etc. before heading off for a week in sunny (I pray) Baska Voda, Croatia. The road trip takes us through bread basket of Kosovo, the spectacular mountains of Montenegro, perhaps around a rockslide or two, to the coast where we cross into Croatia, then Bosnia-Hercegovina, before crossing back in to Croatia just a couple of hours from our destination. Oh! Let it be sunny this year! (It's always a toss-up this time of year whether we'll have warm sun or chilly storms or some combination of both).

Frankly I'm excited to be heading back to Baska Voda. It's a small town, but this time of year it's pretty much ours for a week. THe locals are totally nice and the accomodations are perfect--which includes the run of a large upstairs room where my colleagues are known to stay up late playing intense games of Phase 10 and Uno whilst drinking endless cups of coffee (and this after a morning of worship, message, and strategic field meetings and an afternoon at the beach or hotel pool. Really, our field forum times are a great opportunity for us to fellowship as a team, strengthening our bonds and encouraging one another, as well as times for business meetings and strategic stuff. :)

Please be praying with us for a safe trip and meaningful time spent together. Oh yes, and please pray for sun too. Catch ya on the flip-side!

Carolyn